I was shocked when I first became a single mother. Wolf was two years old and I had been with his dad for eight years. I hated the term. I struggled. I never thought I’d find myself in such a position and felt so exposed, vulnerable and damn terrified.
There have been some truly hideous years, but Wolf recently turned seven and amongst the complete joy and pride I felt, I found myself thinking, “I’ve made it so far”. And wow, it’s one of the most magnificent and overwhelming thoughts I’ve had.
It’s my greatest achievement.
It got me thinking about being a single mother, and while it can be without a doubt incredibly hard, there are some upsides, which I’d like to revel in. Just for a bit.
I have an admission of sorts to make and it has nothing to do with Geek Pride Day today. No. This confession relates to my interests and joys and perhaps my fears as well.
I’m becoming an old woman.
If there was one thing I would bottle, besides the feeling I get when I’m sick and my son strokes my forehead (who’s the parent here, right?), it would be the weekends. You know the ones when you awake feeling fresh and new, no hangover, no additional work, no obligations… just good.
I’ve become quite selfish about the weekends. Oh yes. I like sleep ins, followed by the warm intoxication of fresh coffee. Sporadic conversations with Wolf, in between passive jazz notes. Shared showers. And lately, slowly making our way down to youeni.